corafortsupport.org

It was so quiet last night. I sat and reflected on how much has happened in just a couple of days, much less a few weeks. Dad and I watched a movie, and he fell asleep. He is doing ok for now. He has been trying to call people and let them know about mom. I am surprised that after three straight days of calling, that he there are still people to call.

Many times I find dad comforting people who have just found out.

Today we spent most of the day preparing the house for us to leave. I also finished moms obituary and went through some of her things so dad wouldn’t have to. It is a sad process at times, but it needs to be done.

At Mass, the choir sang te song that mom most enjoyed singing while she was in the choir, “Pan de Vida”. They also sang the song, “I am the bread of life”, which I had to stop singing since I was about to burst into tears. (that’s the song that goes , “and He will raise you up on the last day.”)

I am excited to get back to Seattle where we have a bigger support group, and also to be reunited with Christine and family.

Thanks for all of the phone calls, text messages, prayers, and love you are sending our way.. .we feel it!!!

Love, Michael

These are some of the hotels in the city of Federal Way, less then 5 minutes from the church, and just 15 minutes from the airport.

La Quinta Inn Hotel Info: 800-246-8357

Quality Inn and Suites Hotel Info: 800-246-8357

Econ Lodge Hotel Info: 800-246-8357

Best Western Hotel Info: 800-246-8357

Courtyard by Marriott Hotel Info: 800-246-8357

There will be an opportunity at both the memorial vigil, and the funeral mass to make donations to organizations important to mom. We are deciding as a family which organizations mom would most like to support.

We are also starting a fund in mom’s name, that will go to support students in some way. More info on this later.

We have also been asked and told about a tradition where people may wish to give donations to offset the costs of the funeral. For those who wish to do this, there will be a basket for cards at both celebrations.

Thank you for your concern and love.

We should all be arriving in Washington by Tuesday morning at the latest, Monday night hopefully:-)

After all of the craziness of the past 10 days, it is now just dad and I.

Christine Paul and the kids just left for California, Tito Victor left at 1pm and that just leaves us.

We had a small scare just as Christine and Paul were leaving. All of a sudden dad couldn’t breathe, and started breaking out. He took two benadryl and it didn’t seem to help. After getting ready to take him to the ER, he asked for five minutes. After five minutes, he seemed to be getting better, so I am just watching over him tonight.

I think tonight is going to be a challenge for both of us. It is going to be pretty quiet and lonely tonight.

I have to finish mom’s obituary, but can’t seem to even get started. I found grandpa’s, so that should help.

Thanks for the prayers…oh and most of all, thanks too for those who have visited and signed moms memorial site at

http://www.caringbridge.com/visit/corazon

Dad and the family are really drawing comfort from the kind words.

Love,

Michael

We (Dad, myself, Christine, and Tito Victor) went at 8am to be present for mom’s cremation. They offer this to allow people to be sure that it is their loved one being cremated.

Mom’s casket was a lavender color with felt covering with a floral print. Mom was wearing white silk with roses on it and a matching red head covering Her hands were clasped gently on her stomach, holding a Rosary and a single red rose. She also wore the brown scapular around her neck. She really looked peaceful, and looked to be smiling even more so than yesterday.

They opened her casket one last time, and one by one we each placed a rose on her chest. Her skin was still soft, she smelled like mom, and I was able to kiss and hug her one last time. When we gave the ok, they closed the casket and slid it into the crematorium furnace.

It was eerie, surreal, intense, and yet loving.

I don’t know if this is an official stage of grief, but, it seems like we are all questioning ourselves about if we could have done more.

After discussing it, we all realize that we did all that we could, but there just wasn’t anything earthly left to do.

I encourage any other adult children out there to not just hug their parents, but to look the in the eye, and tell them you love them.

The thing I will miss most is that I won’t get to experience mom looking in my eyes and saying, “Michael, I love you SO much. You were my firstborn, and I was so happy to have a boy. You have been so generous and giving of yourself. Thank you for everything you have done for me!”

Whenever, mom would hug me over the last month, she would say those words and gaze into my eyes. The gaze of a mother who knew she would not have many of these hugs left to give her son, or times to look past his eyes, into his heart, to show her how much she truly loved him.

During these moments, I would try and take in every sense I was feeling, the smell, the touch, even the sound, so that I could remember the look of moms eyes, and the feeling of these hugs that I would soon not receive any longer.

So go give hugs to the people you love today.

Love Michael

Today we held a small private funeral Mass for mom, prior to her cremation tomorrow.

The most touching part was when Aidan, who is five years old) went up to the casket and said to my sister, “Is this Mata’s treasure chest?”

Then he stood there gazing at mom. after a minute his eyes welled up with tears, then one rolled down his cheek, until he started to cry. After the Mass he wanted to go back and see Mata again, so he walked up to the casket and gazed at Mata, and then put his hand on hers and just stood there staring at her with so much love. He surprised us all when he turned to my sister and said, “I want to kiss Mata.”

So Paul and Christine lifted AD up to the the casket, and he kissed Mata for the last time.

When they put him back down, he said, “Mata smells good!”

They had such a special relationship. I weeped for the times he will not get to have with his Mata. I know she will guide him from above though:-)

I was reminded of JFK jr at President Kennedy’s funeral. It brought tears to my eyes again.

Mom still looks so angelic, like she did yesterday. Her skin is so smooth and soft. I didn’t want to leave her.

I don’t know if I posted this before, but the location of the Sunday evening memorial vigil has been confirmed. It will be held at 7:30pm at St Vincent DePaul Church in Federal Way, the same place the funeral Mass will be held on Monday the 18th at 11am.

We are making arrangements at local hotels for those who will be traveling from out of town or out of the country. If anyone from WWU needs a place to stay, Ian still lives with me, and we have plenty of couches:-)

Please feel free to start spreading the word to people about the dates and times of the Memorial Vigil, and the Funeral Mass.

The memorial vigil will feature scripture, music, talks by friends, and slideshow presentations. It will be approximately 1 hour long. Sunday June 17, 2007 at St Vincent De Paul parish in Federal Way, WA

The Funeral Mass will be a Roman Catholic Mass, with a one short Eulogy. This will be approximately an hour to an hour and 20 minutes. It will be followed by a celebration of life in the parish hall, where lunch will be served. The slideshow from the memorial service will also be shown at the funeral reception.

We will be making a memory book more details to follow about this.

Thank you thank you thank you so much for your calls, emails, text messages, and prayers. They are truly keeping us going. From the bottom of our hearts we TRULY enjoy hering from you!

The Gatbuntons

Yesterday was a blur. By evening, I was reflective. I stopped and bought some books on grief at barnes and noble. I also bouthg a book called “I love you forever” which a relay friend Marian Swanson thought would be a good read. It was a beautiful story, and reminded me of my relationship with mom.

When I say reflective, I guess I started to realize that I would not get to hug mom again, or see her look me in the eyes with love, or hear her tell me about how I was her first born, and tell me about what things were like after I was born.

I also started to think about what mom would want me to say in her Eulogy. To date this will be the most important talk I have ever given. So much to say, so important, and yet, I don’t know where to start.

Dad spent most of yesterday on the phone calling people. By nights end, he started to look sad, and tired. He fell asleep early, by the altar, with a Divine Mercy prayer book open on his lap.

Today we went to the local funeral home, to make arrangements. Big business… I thought weddings were big business, at one point, and Shelley will get a kick out of this, I pondered if i could start a funeral home:-)

First, they show you a brown cardboard coffin box and say, “This is the standard box that comes with the standard service package.” Then they show you an array of Coffins that range from $500-$3000.

Also did you know that when someone is cremated, they actually have a word for it? They call it cremains. Like Bennifer, Brangelina, or TomKat.

Anyways… being at the funeral home was somewhat depressing. We are returning later for an intimate service with our immediate family and my moms brother Tito Victor who arrived yesterday, just hours too late to see mom before she passed.

Tomorrow morning at 8am, we will go view the cremation. This means we identify mom before the coffin is closed, and then watch the coffin being placed in the crematorium, and then go and wait outside. All this stuff is surreal.

Thanks to all who have visited and signed moms memory page at http://www.caringbridge.com/visit/corazon

Will write more later…

Love, Michael and family

A funeral Mass will be held for mom (Corazon) at Saint Vincent DePaul Parish in Federal Way, WA on Monday June 18, 2007 at 11am, followed by a reception and celebration of life.

There will aso be a Memorial Vigil held the evening before at 7:30pm more details on this and location to follow.

There will be a private burial at a later date for family only.

Please check back for more details.

Also, all of us, especially dad, have really found solace in the postings that have been made on the website we set up for people to leave messages and memories. Please conitinue to do this

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/corazon

Finally, thank you for all of the phone calls, text messages, voice mails, prayers, and most of all… LOVE!

Fortunato, Michael, Christine, Paul, Nina and Aidan

Heaven has another angel.

Mom crossed over and joined her many friends and relatives that have gone before her. She went peacefully drawing her last breath at 2am. We all gathered around mom and spent time with her. She was not picked up by the funeral home until 10:45am.

I will go into the more spiritual aspect of what happened in a later post.

The most reassuring thing about the experience is that for the past two days, mom really had looked uncomfortable and very sick.

After she initially passed, about 30 minute later we noticed she began to look different. Prior to passing her mouth would not close no matter what we did.

Well after about an hour, moms color came back to her face, her mouth closed, and she had a smile on her face! She looked completely at peace. When the hospice nurse arrived, she said it was the most dramatic change she had seen in all her years of hospice, and she also said mom looked the most happy and at peace of anyone she had ever worked with.

We don’t mind phone calls, so don’t be hesitant to call if you feel like it. Or you can visit the new site we created for people to leave comments and share memories about mom. Some people are better at writing their feelings rather than speaking them.

We are currently in the process of arranging the memorial vigil and a funeral mass. More details to follow.

Mom is suffering no more, and she is with our Lord. Praise God!